“The lawyer must not be crossed because she knows everything about everything. There are conceptual monograms embedded in her very core that cannot ever be decoded. Her brain can process information in ways we cannot understand. If we catch her gaze, this automatically inaugurates an analytical process causing her to discover our hidden truths. This is how she attains success – she solves the puzzle by spotting the secret to the client’s problem."
I thought that I would be proud to tell others that I am a lawyer. I realized, however, that I would rather not discuss it in social settings. I dislike lawyer jokes. Let me repeat that, I really, really dislike them. I dislike hearing “don’t do that, she will sue you.” I dislike arguing just for the sake of it. I dislike meeting someone for the very first time, having a normal and relaxed conversation, until they start treating me like their idea of a lawyer. As if that wasn’t enough, in a lawyer setting, I am treated as a young woman that does not look like a lawyer; yet in a social setting, I am not treated as a young woman but rather as a lawyer. A big, scary lawyer.
I like my high heels and my fitted suits but I dislike wearing them in court because they make me more of a woman. I like meeting people and discussing business but I dislike networking with senior lawyers because they overstep their boundaries – to them, once again, I am a young woman.
I, the lawyer want to be just “I” outside the courtroom and “the lawyer” inside the courtroom. I, the lawyer, am no different than you, the engineer or you, the teacher, or you, the preacher. Yes, I do realize that rhymes and sounds funny. I, like you, can write like I talk and, you know, be wrong and stuff.